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Advice From Buttslice Welcome to the advice column that I put together based on ideas of folks I see every day. But remember as the band says, "you might take it once, but won't take it twice". If you would like to submit a topic for "Advice From Buttslice" you can e-mail Buttslice at jdholt@blackbottombiscuits.com
The advice found on this page is solely the opinion expressed by Buttslice and not necessarily those of the rest of the band.
Howdy Biscuitheads! It's time again for another edition of Advice from Buttslice. As usual, I want to dazzle ya'll with my enlightenment as well as let everyone know what's new from the Black Bottom Biscuits.
Arnie, T.Van, and I are working hard with Ms. Carlette West to refine our rough edges, and teach us about recording as well as performing. Carlette is determined to help us make the third CD our best effort yet and something the fans can really appreciate. If Carlette hasn't figured it out already, she certainly has her work cut out for her.
Speaking of Carlette, she has nicknamed me 'Elvis' and says she is ready to take me to Hollywood. I'm not sure that So. Cal. is ready for my kind of pizzazz, but I figure what the 'walk of fame' really needs, is a star with 'Buttslice' written across it. Hey, if Dolly Pardon can have her boobs immortalized in concrete, just imagine what I can do with a sidewalk and the crack of my ass.
For those of you wondering about the name of our new CD, we are conducting an unofficial, unaudited, and totally useless poll of our fans to determine what the name should be. So far, the poll looks like this:
My Home is South Carolina - 45%, Blood Money - 35%, and Don't You F---ing Tell Me How to Play Guitar - 20%.
Keep voting fans!
Finally, the moment you've been waiting for (drum roll)...
This edition of 'Advice from Buttslice' comes from our own T. Van Abernathy. Van taught us an interesting lesson during a recent gig at a private party. After we finished playing, we were talking to a few of the folks in the crowd, and Van finds a particularly attractive fan inquiring about people we know in the music business. When the natural beauty asks if we know one person in particular, T.Van quickly offered "Yea, his long hair and ears always reminded me of a troll." Unfortunately for Van, the brunette replied "He's my ex boyfriend." Just in case you are wondering, the brunette left the party alone.
Better luck next time T. Van.
So remember fans, come spend a few minutes meeting the Biscuits the next time you're out at one of our venues. And for all you ladies at that could 'Hurt Somebody Looking Like That', make sure you bring a list of current, past and future boyfriends so that T.Van won't offend. See ya'll soon!
Buttslice 
News Flash!!!! Comming Soon!!! Beginning soon, readers of this very advice column will get the opportunity to experience the new online sensation ........ Where's Buttslice?
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